High Expectations.

The first thing I feel when I wake up in the morning is the thought of having to prove myself again, not only to myself but also to others. I have to be striving for growth, every day, every hour, every minute. That is what I have been told by society, right? Only growth can make us a better human being. I am expected to be the best version of myself. If I am not, I failed. I disappointed. Who? Myself? No. I am disappointed with the fact that I haven’t been able to keep up with the expectations of society. 

But what is society? Society is you and me. It’s your mother, your father, your neighbour. It’s your teacher, your employer. It’s everyone. We are the reason we moulded life into what it is. We are the reason for hate and war. We are the reason humanity is divided. 

But I have a good message for you. We have the power to break through this cluster of expectations and conflict. Yes we are the cause for today’s society, but we can be the cause to change this mindset of you and me. We have the power to create beauty and acceptance.

To make clear from my side, there is nothing wrong with growth. But there is something wrong with expectations that we can not always keep up with, because we are human beings. And disappointments of unfulfilled expectations create a negative state of mind which can cause a vicious circle of never being good enough and constantly feeling like being under pressure. 

For this reason, I want people to finally start creating the society they truly want to live in. And to follow their dreams and aspirations. And to stop judging people, that are actually on their path of doing so. Because these are the people we should be looking up to.

With love,

Jess x

"Having meaning in life is the most important thing." - #BeInspired

Hello Everyone!

A few days ago I have written a blog post about how important it is to get yourself around people that inspire you and make you a better human being. 

For this reason, I have decided to interview people, that have not only inspired me, but also changed my life. I wanted to share their story with you. Sometimes we are so focused on ourselves, that we tend to forget what is happening around us, and what amazing human beings we are surrounded by. 

The first story is about an incredible woman, that I have met two years ago, when I was doing an internship in South Africa. The second time I have met her, which was last year, we have spent a lot more time with each other. She has honestly left such an impression on me. Her way of living and thinking has shown me that there are sincere and good hearted people in this world. And I wanted to thank her. Especially, because I think, that she doesn’t realise what kind of impact she has had on my life. 

Her name is Danai Mundeta and she is 30 years old. When asking her how old she actually

feels like, she has said between 26 and 28, for the reason that the reality of getting married or starting a family is not there yet. She is currently living in Johannesburg, but she was born and raised in Zimbabwe, which lies on the border with South Africa. 

One trait that Danai has and I noticed from the beginning is that she not only is very responsible and independent, but she can truly call herself a hard working individual. I believe there is many reasons, why she is the woman she is today. Not only is it a cause of her roots and her amazing and supportive parents (which I got to know as well), but also because she grew up in a third world country, which made her see and experience a lot of different things, that people from a first world country can hardly relate to. She believes in hard work and perseverance. And “if you are lazy, nothing will come out.”

One turning point in her life was a very bad relationship and a very bad break up, which changed her in that sense, that she actually discovered herself. She has told me that she was living for other people, instead of herself, which made her loose herself. Furthermore, she started believing that growth wasn’t possible anymore. As a consequence she has learned that

“If you put your focus on yourself and what you want to be and what you want to do, you will see that you are not limited. People can limit you, if you have the wrong person in your life .”

When I asked her about one message, that she would love to share with the world, she answered Love.

“To Love people, Love Yourself first and Love your family.”

But on the other side, people should know their boundaries and other people’s boundaries, especially because you will never ever figure out someone completely. There will be people that will hurt you. But that should not limit yourself.

When I asked what the most important thing in her life is, she said her mother and herself. She believes that having a special journey is important, as well as a meaning in life. Danai is Christian, which is a big part of her life and she knows that living for something is as important. 

I personally have been to South Africa twice for a longer amount of time, which gave me the opportunity to get to know this amazing country. But I wanted to know it from someone that has been living in the country for a long time and for this reason I asked Danai to describe South Africa in three words. She answered:

Beautiful. Busy. Opportunity

She furthermore believes that there is great opportunity in the country, which for me was the first thing that I have seen in South Africa as well. 

Lastly, I wanted to know the one thing she would change in the world if she could and she said Social Media and Phone Cameras. 

“People don’t live life anymore because they are so worried about what people think about them on Social Media. They want to take a picture of their food. People don’t live an experienced moment. People want to be validated by Social Media. They want to check how many likes the have. They want to see if they are pretty, if their shot is right.”

Honestly, I have to agree on this one. How many times do we get caught in front of our screens instead of really living life?.. Too much.

I wanted to thank Danai for taking her time to be part of this project of mine. 

I hope you enjoyed this read.

Have a wonderful inspiring week!

With Love,
Jess x

It is okay to get your heart broken. And I will tell you why.

I know, I know. If your heart has been broken recently, this might probably be the last thing you will want to read. But trust me, keep reading. It won't get worse, I promise.

My heart has been broken. And it is not a long time ago. But long enough, to be able to reflect upon everything. How did it get broken? Well. I was in love with this wonderful human being. But after a good while, things started getting to crumble and well, I think you can imagine what happened. And it wasn't as smooth as it might sound. It was horrible. At least from my side. I felt devastated, I felt lost.

It took me a while to recover. And the moment I thought I was doing great, I have received news, that have brought be down even more. I felt like it could not get worse. I felt like I forgot what happiness is. I felt like I could never be happy again.

These moments are the ones, that no one ever wants to experience. But we tend to forget that these moments are exactly the ones, that teach us something. Not about others, but about ourselves. These are the moments we should embrace and help us make understand who we really are and what we really want. Getting our heart broken is part of the circle of life. It is the moment where we truly feel like we are alive and we feel all those different types of emotions. Emotions that sometimes seem hard to control and which we sometimes want to turn off.

But these moments give you something, that you will never get back. Experience.
Yes. Read Again. Experience.

Just because of the experience we have had 5 years ago, we are the person we are today. Ever thought about that? The experience we are getting and making today, will make us the person we will be in the next 5 years. Even though in the moment, it might seem like the end of the world and nothing makes sense anymore (trust me, I have been there), this moment will fade, slowly, but it will.

Give yourself time. Forgive yourself. And be thankful to be the human you are today. Because experiences form you, they form us. And the decide who we are. And who you are. 

With love,

Jess x

Surround yourself with inspiring people.

Why? Because life is short. And yes I think I keep saying that a lot in my posts. But it is true. It is a reality that so many of us do not understand or do not want to realise. I think each one of us on this planet has its dreams and goals and wants to achieve something bigger in life, right? Well, at least this is what I hope. And in order to become that person, I think it is very significant to choose the people that you surround yourself with, very wisely. You want to be inspired by them and they should make you feel motivated and not the opposite. 

Each person has a different story and comes from a different background. Sometimes we are so busy just focusing on our own life instead of actually looking at the bigger picture in order to get to know other people’s life stories. By surrounding yourself with people that actually care about your story and want to share theirs with you, you can build an incredible bound and you can learn more from each other than you can imagine. But this is a very subjective view of mine. Because this is exactly how I feel, every time I meet an incredible person. A person that I feel can inspire me in being a better person. 

You might agree or disagree with me on this one, obviously this is completely up to you. But give yourself some time to think about it :)

With love,

Jess x